Happiness, the Holidays , those little white lies and the unspoken truth

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My goodness, the title on this blog entry makes me bristle just a bit 😉  Aww the holidays , what’s it all about ? If you ask 10 different people (whom aren’t saying what they think you want to hear) you are likely to get 10 different answers! Not everybody is about the holidays, that’s okay, those Norman Rockwell images are nice and invoke ideal images but that isn’t reality !

portrait of happy girl with ice cream
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Disclaimer, early on, not encouraging lying here, communication is key during the holiday season, honest conversation are clearly always first choice and will amp up your happiness ! Quite a few caveats on this though (this is where you want to stop reading if Santa is “real”) …  Likely one of the first white lies we were told as we grew up was “Santa”, white lie for sure, that whole naughty-nice thing a clever twist, so much excitement and happiness built on this fictional character 🙂 Obviously if you find yourselves in the company of families children you should play along with the notion of “Santa”, white lie or not, it will bring nobody happiness and certainly earn you Scrooge status to be the one that let that cat out of the bag !  One of the things about the childhood “Santa” charade is that it helps children get through the holidays through better behavior, hopefully sets up value in charitable giving (after all Santa is basically a stranger, right?) and exposes them to the give and take of the Holiday season.

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As we age the holidays, for better or worse should become more focused on quality time with people and family and a whole lot less about material things, but what we shouldn’t lose is other important things the idea of Santa taught us. Once again, not encouraging lies but Mom’s rule of “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all” should be practiced within an inch of an actual lie.  If Aunt Helen’s hair looks like a rat’s nest, you really have no need or obligation to point this out ! If Aunt Helen asks how you like the “new” style there is no shame in saying it’s very unique or I haven’t seen that style before, or really anything other than it looks like a rats nest, clearly Aunt Helen thinks it looks good ! Thinking back to Santa, there was never a religious, political, monetary, health or lifestyle association, as adults however I have too often seen the holidays turn into discussions that are anything but Jolly, the holidays are about coming together and relishing each others company!  We would all be better served sharing happiness than harassing or jabbing at each other, politics, religious differences. monetary issues, health issues, lifestyle differences should be set aside, there is no happiness to be found in these pursuits.  Share happiness, don’t share conflict, conflict never ends in happiness !

black haired man in white crew neck t shirt
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We should all seek to raise each other up, especially during the holidays, there is more than one way to say anything, choose the one that creates the most happiness. Feel free to let unspoken truths remain unspoken if it dings somebody’s happiness.  As much as our happiness is about ourselves, it’s more so about the people around us, share your happiness and watch it come right back 2 fold ! Be kind, be compassionate, keep it in perspective (couldn’t resist), the Holidays is the time to come together and share what we have in common, save the differences of opinion for some other time (or better yet just except that not everybody you love and value shares your opinions).

Save the white lies for the kids, leave the untold truths alone, remember whats important and I can almost assure you a happier holiday 🙂

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